Yesterday I was offered a job at Patana School working as a Learning Support teacher in KS 3 and 4.  I am really looking forward to starting tomorrow at 8.30 when I meet the rest of the team.  Today I had my medical inspection.  I was whisked off to the local hospital in one of the school's minibuses and within five minutes was pulling up outside a modern, well kept building which could easily have been a bank apart form the odd wheelchair coming out of the sliding doors.  A doorman in a crisp white and gold uniform opened the door and saluted me as he welcomed me to the hospital.  I arrived at reception where there where no queues and was ushered into the lift and onto the second floor.  There was some problem with the paper work but a young woman in a smart working suit came to translate.  Quickly the problems were resolved and I took a seat.  Within three minutes a nurse came and asked me to stand against the wall whilst she took my height and weight. then I sat down in front of the waiting room and had my blood pressure taken. 'No problems' the nurse announced to the assembled room.  Thank God for that I thought because the whole room would know if I had. Again, I was asked to take a seat then after only a few minutes was ushered into a small anteroom and blood was taken just to check if I had syphalis.  I think I passed!  It is standard Thai practice for all their foreign teachers if yoiu want a work permit. As I sat for the last part of my medical, I watched the main reception desk with interest.  There were six young girls standing there, each with a specific role.  One would receive the file or report, another would collate it and a third would put it for filing or send it on to another department.  Two nearby would stand and chat and the last would set off for the next report.  Everything was calm and tranquility.  The shops are the same with huge numbers of staff standing ready to serve you.  At times there are more staff than customers.
My medical over, I was directed over to the most important section, the accounts section where I had to sign a chit to say i had had the work done.  You could tell it was an important section because all the staff were displayed with their photographs on a notice board unlike any of the nursing departments.  I signed and was then shown out.  Once more the doorman in his immaculate white uniform called my driver, opened the door for me before closing it once I was safely seated and then we set off back to school.  Just like Barnsley Hospital...not, I thought.

Monday mornings are one of my pleasures because that is when Khun Sia, our maid, comes to tidy the flat, wash the floors, do all the ironing and generally make the apartment spotless.  She speaks very little English and I speak very little Thai.  She is trying hard to improve my understanding of the local language but much of our communicationis done by hand waving and something that looks a bit like charades.  Imagine trying to get your house cleaned, ironing at the right heat, washing at correct temperatures and then organising payday by mime alone.  I'm shattered by the end but she is so willing and we talk about all sorts.  Its bit like Eric Morcombe 'I'm saying the right words but not necessarily in the right language.'  I have bored her with pictures of the family and she is fantastic because she answers all the test questions I give her based on last weeks lesson and still seems to be enthusiastic.  Whoever pays the piper calls the tune. But I will persevere until she knows at least all the present gereration of our family and can answer without error!
Today we have naming of parts, well going shopping, yet another task I have added onto her steadily increasing list.  I have learned the Thai word for bananas and she knows I want milk but how in God's name do you mime semi skimmed.  Anyway, I think we have managed that one and now we are onto natural yogart.  I tried to give her a taste by dipping the spoon into the pot but she pulled a most disgusted face as if |I was poisioning her and said she would do without the tasting.  Next week I can't wait to see what turns up in the fridge, if anything.  

In a previous blog, I told you how I had met this super Thai birder called Gum. Last Wednesday, on his day off, Gum organised a birding trip for me along the northern shores of the Gulf of Thailand. He arranged to pick me up at Big C, a local equivalent of Wilkinsons, and then we set off for Samut Sakhon. There are some well documented birdwatching sites along this stretch of coast incluyding Khok Kham. It is a reliable site for small numbers of the endangered Spoon-billed Sandpiper. However, it was still too early for them to arrive but it was full of waders with loads of Black-tailed Godwits and Sandplover.

The sun beat down with very little cover as I scanned the thousands of waders stretched out in front of me albeit at some distance. A party of Indian ecologists arrived. who were part of a convention touring Thailand looking at conservation projects. They assumed that, since I had a telescope, I was part of the convention and.started talking to me about the success of the mangrove regen.eration project. Their English was very good but despite me explaining that I knew nothing about mangroves, coming as I did from Sheffield where we didn't have much call for mangrove regeneration, they continued to pump me with questions and seemed slightly disappointed when I didn't provide them with enlightenment. Gum and I made a number of excuses and made our way back to the car leaving them scatching their heads. We then went on for lunch in a bamboo hut on the beach.over-looking the sea. 'Aloy' the owner kept saying to me which means delicious and I kept nodding my head as it was truely aloy.  Another great day.

26th August

Earlier this week we went down to Lumpini night market.  It seemed rather subdued and many stalls were closed which was a result, we were told of the troubles earlier this year.  Business is only just starting up again and many folk are still staying away or at least the farang who spend the money ( it means foreigner but is the same as the word for guava)  The market is composed of brightly lit, covered alleyways selling many items of Thai culture including every branded lable you can think of at bargin prices.  Bargining is the norm and is something which takes some time to adjust to since things seem pretty cheap anyway.  Still it doesn't do not to take part and one quickly slips into saying to each other 'that was steep.  Lets go somewhere else'  Although busy the market was not full and over half the stalls were closed.  we walked round for an hour or so and bought nothing.  Not because there wasn't anything to buy.  There was some lovely stuff.  We just have two years in which to sellect exactly what we want so why rush.  We left a house full of things and have no desire to fill up another except with things that are really special.  Most of the most important things aren't for sale anyway. 

Three weeks now

A week ago I was. walking round. King Rama IX P.ark. It was early morning and the joggers and cyclists crowded the paths. Oriental music strained out of tiny PA systems as groups of Thai Che. enthusiasts elegently moved on bended knees. It was already hot and humid despite it being before 7. o'clock. The sound of sunbirds and babblers added to the exotic feel contrasting with the plastic swans that appear on so many ormanmental lakes in the far east, bobbing. languidly on the still water of the lake. These can be rented out for 40 baht at weekends. A canary like Common Iora clambered in the trees next to me seeping like a long-tailed tit and an Indian Roller swooped down taking an insect before swoopuing back up onto the telephone wires. Much of the park is carefully controlled by an army of attendents who are constantly snipping and chopping but there is a small over grown lake surrounded by tall trees and exotic ferns.  The sweet call of Magpie Robins can be heard everywhere and Pied Fantails run about on the ground in front of me living up to their name.  The Park has a number of gardens from around the world, one from China, one from Spain and an English garden although there is not much recognisable. A family of long-tailed shrikes have taken up residence here and huge monitor lizards move stealthily through the water. It was at this point that I met a wonderful local birder called Gum.  He was busy trying to photograph a stork-billed kingfisher although it remained steadfastly elusive all day.  We had a brief view of this huge bird shoot across the back of the pond, its irredesent blue wings and huge orange bill flashing through the reeds but sadly it passed all too quickly. Gum spent the day showing me what the park could offer including some excellent views of Little Minivet which looks like a long tailed redstart.  We shared water and a common interest and although communication was not easy, for long periods of time it didn't matter.  Gum is an artist and emailed me some of his wonderful bird pictures.  He paints these for his own pleasure. He has a gallery and sells his work all over the world.  His style is modern and abstract but he told me that painting is his job, birding is his passion.      

First impressions: Bangkok is not what I was expecting. It is much more developed. The roads are not a nightmare, busy but not as crazy as Iraq or Korea. There is much more vegetation with trees, palms and banana plants being common, interspersed with patches of tall reeds and scrub. Skyscrapers can be found in the middle of Bangkok but much of the suburbs are low rise flats or houses much of which is poor quality. There are many more birds than anticipated. I have already seen sunbirds, flowerpeckers, swifts, swallows, cormorants, mynas, doves and bulbuls from the apartment.


We were taken on a tour round the school yesterday and the centre piece was a stunning new Arts Centre costing over £6million and would grace any city in the UK let alone a school. It has an auditorium that is quite fantastic. The other faculties, especially the sporting ones, are also of high quality and development is still underway. The building work is anticipated to be finished when the time school opens on 20th August and thai workers swarm over the site in something that looks like scene from ‘Challenge Anaka’. Health and safety is rudimentary at best and I sit on our balcony watched them working wincing at some of the dangerous practices.

Our fellow staff have all been superb without exception and our induction couldn’t have been any better. We have eaten at the Red and White restaurant which is only 100 metres away but with both a superb range and quality of food. Our group has been challenging itself to taking one blind dish each day ie duck’s bill one day and fried worms another (a bit tough with a hint of sea salt and grit!)

We went in to Chatachuk market today which is supposedly the biggest market in the world. It is certainly vast with narrow alleyways crammed with stalls selling everything from live animals to herbal medicines. It is so easy to get lost and trying to re-find a stall is almost impossible at the moment. However I suspect we will get to know it pretty well in time. Bargaining is the norm and despite what you might think, I am a novice. We were only there for two hours and hardly scratched the surface. Bangkok is mad and vibrant but not as mad as I expected. The driving is interesting but forgiving and everyone says ‘mai pen rai’ which means chill basically. Eunice and I attended our Thai culture classes last week and this phrase was given to us. In my usual pedantic way, I wanted to know how to use it appropriately. Little did I know that a graphic illustration was soon to be provided. I was returning from visiting King Rama Park IX having had a good morning for birding adding Common Iora and Asian Koel (a black bird the size of a jackdaw and a most haunting, loud tropical call). I had given the taxi driver the location and should have realised that his expression was a little blank. Thai’s are far too polite to ask you for clarification (especially a taxi driver who thinks he might lose a job!) we set off and headed almost in the right direction. When arriving at some traffic lights, I used my newly learned skills and told the taxi driver to go straight on. Unfortunately my pronunciation left a little to be desired and he corrected me. He then proceeded to give me a Thai language class in correct pronunciation for directions, ensuring I repeated them correctly. By this point we had arrived at my destination and I told him to pull in left which he promptly did by turning into a narrow street. I then gave him the instruction jud which means to stop. At this he laughed and carried on, repeating the word and also various other Thai directional words. I said jud again only more forcefully and still he laughed and carried on repeating the phrases. I said ‘listen, I really mean jud,’ thinking how far could this go on for! He had no English so assumed it was all part of my Thai education course. By this time I was on the point of saying ‘for Christ’s sake jud!’ We had already travelled half a mile. At last he pulled into a grand hotel which he assumed I had been heading for. I got out and paid him thinking it was easier to walk back. At this point a security guard came up and challenged me and he also spoke no English so I just pointed that I was leaving. But Thai’s are nothing if not extremely polite and helpful and he rushed into the hairdressing salon and dragged the hair dresser out leaving a customer in mid cut. She spoke good English and I explained what had happened. She laughed, was highly apologetic even though she had done nothing and told me she would get the taxi driver to take me back. I pointlessly pleaded with her not to bother as it was nothing for me to walk back. She hailed the taxi driver who was still hanging around and explained what had happened. He looked extremely embarrassed and waied a number of times. The door was opened and as I slipped into the back seat I said mai pen rai and smiled. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief and smiled saying Mai pen rai. The taxi driver took me back to school for free.



Today the cleaner has started. Her name is Khun Sia. The booking of her was a bit stressful with Eunice, myself a translator sitting round one side of a table and Khun Sia on the other whilst we hammered out rates terms and conditions. Finally deal was struck and she seems fine. Surprisingly, English is not as well spoken her as it was in Korea.



Yesterday, I played squash for the first time in 25 years and Eunice swam half a kilometre in the Olympic sized pool. Both are quite an achievement as we have been out of the exercise loop for some time. I was completely wiped out and sweated half my body weight as the air con was not switched on. Eunice was serene as always but proud of her achievements. I watched her swim her last few lengths as I cooled down from the squash. A huge irredesent kingfisher flapped languidly across the pool and a sunbird busily flew in and out of her nest only inches above my head.

Eunice’s worries about her asthma and the pollution seem to have been groundless. In fact she seems better than she was in UK except for some nasty bites. The temperature is high and the humidity is like going into your bathroom when you have a bath or walking into a swimming centre.